40 things you'd like to say out loud at work

Got a Joke tell of something amusing to share? Well post it here
Post Reply
User avatar
Colette
Team Cougar
Posts: 3089
Joined: Thu Apr 22, 2004 10:20 am
Bike: ZX6R
State: New South Wales

40 things you'd like to say out loud at work

Post by Colette »

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in
public.
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my
way.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a damn word you're
saying.
10. Ahhhh .. I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.
11. I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a damn.
14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of
view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
18. Any connections between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks?!
20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn Off
22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
23. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be?
24. Do I look like a people person?
25. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
26. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
27. Sarcasm is just one service we offer.
28. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
31. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
33. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?
34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
35. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
36. Chaos, panic and disorder...my work here is done.
37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
38. I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary.
39. Who lit the fuse on your tampon?
40. Oh, I get it...like humor...but different.
User avatar
Lone Wolf
KSRC Contributor
KSRC Contributor
Posts: 1258
Joined: Thu Nov 16, 2006 3:42 pm
Bike: ZX7R
State: Queensland
Location: Redcliffe
Contact:

Post by Lone Wolf »

laughing4.gif
"Women are temperamental... half temper, half mental."

http://www.corporateboxgym.com.au
User avatar
kellz
KSRC Contributor
KSRC Contributor
Posts: 1344
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2005 9:36 pm
Bike: ZX9R
State: New South Wales
Location: moss vegas NSW

Post by kellz »

so true...

lol love it col
Image
User avatar
mike-s
Apprentice Post Whore :-)
Apprentice Post Whore :-)
Posts: 6142
Joined: Sat Aug 07, 2004 5:43 am
Bike: Suzuki
State: New South Wales
Location: Arncliffe, Sydney
Contact:

Post by mike-s »

*forwarding it around the office as we speak*
Image
If it hurts, you aren't doing it right.
User avatar
Gosling1
Team Donut
Team Donut
Posts: 13826
Joined: Mon Jun 20, 2005 9:30 pm
Bike: ZX2R
State: New South Wales
Location: Anarchy Road
Contact:

Post by Gosling1 »

thats going straight onto the Notice Board !!!!! nice work Col

:lol:
".....shut the gate on this one Maxie......it's the ducks guts !!............."
User avatar
robracer
VIP MEMBER
VIP MEMBER
Posts: 15251
Joined: Thu Feb 24, 2005 8:23 pm
Bike: ZX6R
State: New South Wales
Location: Port Macquarie

Post by robracer »

Funny that
(I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary)
my staff say that sorta stuff to me all the time :lol: MF's :lol:
Post Reply